Nothing Gained
by uNperfectXxXx
Summary: "Go after him already." Zoro didn't need to be told twice. (ZoLu Nakamaship)


**So, I love the contradiction of Zoro's first meeting with Luffy and the way his behavior in the crew changes from "I'll kill you if you get in my way" to fierce loyalty. I wanted to portray that a bit here. I hope you like it :)**

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><p><span><strong>Nothing Gained<strong>

It was such a small gesture.

It left them all speechless as Luffy's eyes narrowed, taking on that dead serious glint usually reserved for enemies to aim it at Zoro – _Zoro_ of all people.

"Put that away."

And Zoro looked down, realized his mistake and sheathed his sword all in the same second. It had been merely an inch, a small glint of metal, but the damage was done. They'd all seen it.

Zoro had pulled a sword on his captain.

The swordsman looked up, eyes full of unspoken anguish. "Luffy, I..." And his apology stuck in his throat because Luffy wasn't shouting or crying or even frowning, no, he was_ smiling_ and that was much worse than his serious stare because for all that it meant it was _fake_.

"Right. I promised you", Luffy said with that damned smile and their hearts broke for their captain because it looked so damn natural when it was clearly _not_. "I won't stand between you and your dream. That was your condition. I'm sorry I forgot, you're free to go."

None of them followed Luffy as he went under deck. They _couldn't_, not when Zoro's face was so full of pain and regret and _pain_ that he looked like a completely different person.

For a long time they all stood in silence, trying and failing to get a grip on what just happened until Sanji took a step forward, astonishment slowly giving way to rage.

"Marimo-"

"Shut up!", Zoro shouted, grabbing his head and effectively hiding his face behind his forearms. "Just... shut up."

They watched him rip at his hair without a shred of pity. Zoro might be their nakama and part of their family, but Luffy was their_ captain_ and _no one_ treated Luffy that way.

"You asshole", Nami finally choked through her tears even though Zoro shook his head in fierce denial. He didn't want to hear it. He fucking _knew! _"Why did you make him chose? You _knew_ that he couldn't let you go for something so stupid!"

Despite the situation he still bristled at someone talking about his dream that way. "It's _not_ stupid!"

"Maybe not, but _you're _stupid, you shitty bastard", Sanji gritted out through his teeth, fists clenched at his sides. "How could you betray his trust like that?"

Zoro flinched, actually_ flinched _at the word 'betray'. "I didn't-"

"Don't you _dare_ talk your way out of this!", Sanji yelled, taking an accusatory step towards him. "You can say you didn't mean to do it all you want, but that won't change the fact that you _did!_"

This would probably be the only time Zoro would ever full-heartedly agree with Sanji. The cook was right. It was all his fault.

"I must say, Zoro-san, I am very disappointed", Brook suddenly spoke up, a cold seriousness to his voice that they had never heard before. "Luffy-san has always supported you. You as his first mate should have known his answer."

"I did, I-", Zoro choked, running a hand through his hair as his eyes darted around the ship, not daring to look any of them in the eye. "I _knew _I shouldn't have asked, but-"  
>"But <em>what?<em>", Nami hissed. "Your pride got in the way? Is that it?"

Zoro lowered his gaze. Yes. That was exactly what happened. When he caught the news that Mihawk was nearby he'd lost track of what was good for the crew and only focused on his own goals without any regards for Luffy's feelings.

He'd _known_ that Luffy was right in giving the order to escape from the island. It was all they could do to avoid another run in with that bastard admiral who'd been after their asses for days now. But he just couldn't pass up the chance to challenge his rival again. He _couldn't_.

So when Luffy told him to stay on the ship... he didn't think. He acted.

And betrayed his captain.

"That's what I thought", Nami whispered venomously when Zoro didn't answer, turning away from him with a disgusted huff. "You and your stupid man-pride. I hate that side of you."

He couldn't even find it in himself to be mad at her.

"Seriously, bro", Franky said in disapproval, eyebrows drawn together. "You didn't have to go _that_ far. It's like you just pulled an Usopp on him."

The sniper flinched slightly at the implication, but didn't protest. He'd secretly thought the same thing.

Zoro however had not. "I didn't want to_ leave the crew!_", he shouted, angry that they thought him capable of doing something like that to Luffy. "I would never break our promise!"

"Yeah, but does he know that?"

Zoro looked over at Sanji who was staring back at him with a hard look. What a stupid question. "He should."

"Yeah, but_ does_ he?", the cook pressed on, an unreadable expression on his face.

That got Zoro thinking. Luffy had basically just told him that he was free to leave the crew to fulfill his dream by himself. He internally shook his head at the absurdity of that. There was no way for him to leave Luffy. Not after everything they'd been through. So why would Luffy say that?

Seeing comprehension dawn on the swordsman's face, Sanji sighed.

"Go after him already."

Zoro didn't need to be told twice.

He found Luffy immediately, sitting alone on Sunny's figure head, probably watching the waves. As he saw his captain's shoulders stiffen at the sound of his footsteps regret threatened to choke him, forming a lump in his throat. How was he going to make this right again?

Feeling lower than dirt he stepped up to a safe distance next to his captain, trying to think of something to say when Luffy suddenly broke the silence himself.

"On Omatsuri Island..."

Zoro looked up, not so much surprised by the fact that Luffy had spoken first but by hearing that island's name. Luffy had always refused to tell them about that particular adventure.

"Something bad happened there", Luffy continued, clutching his hands so hard that his knuckles turned white. "_Really_ bad. And it happened because we split up."

Zoro closed his eyes in both understanding and guilt. Even though he still couldn't remember the exact circumstances his captain had obviously been through hell on that island because his nakama had left him alone. And now Zoro had unknowingly tried to do the same thing. No wonder Luffy had reacted so strongly.

"Why didn't you try to stop me?", he asked.

Luffy turned to look at him quizzically.

"As the captain of this ship you should've used force to keep me here", Zoro elaborated, looking at Luffy. "Why didn't you?"

He could see understanding dawn in Luffy's eyes before he turned to face the ocean again. "If... if it had been Sanji or... or anyone else, I would've. Stopped them I mean."

Zoro frowned at that. "Why not me?"

Luffy was silent for a minute before answering in his rare serious voice. "They don't have an agreement."

_Agreement?_ Zoro was startled by the odd phrasing. "Huh?"

Luffy straightened his back where he sat. "On the day you became my nakama you made me promise not to interfere with your dream", he said somberly, pulling his hat into his eyes. "So I won't. You're not bound to be on this ship forever, Zoro. If you want to leave one day I won't stop you."

It felt like a knife twisted into his heart. Zoro was speechless for a moment before anger slowly took over. "You idiot. You don't get it at all, do you?"

Luffy turned to look at him in confusion. This only served to anger Zoro even more.

"Do you honestly think that I can leave this ship?", the swordsman snapped harshly. Luffy looked at him with an unreadable expression. "After all that we've done, did you seriously think that I would just throw it all away?"

Luffy's silence told him everything.

"Goddammit, Luffy!", Zoro roared. "I'm not the same as I was back then! When I lost to Mihawk and swore to never lose again your dream was already linked to mine!" Zoro was furious that he even had to explain this to his captain. Didn't Luffy know just how much he had changed him? How much he had _done?_ "I can't reach my dream without all of you there to see it happening. It wouldn't be right! What does my ambition mean if I have no one to share it with?" Luffy's eyes widened, but Zoro was going to get this all off his chest now, whether he liked it or not. "We're a _family_, Luffy! Our dreams are all connected to each other. There's no singular goal for any of us anymore. I won't be happy unless I can see you all achieve your dreams! If I can't do that then being the greatest swordsman means nothing! Don't you get it?"

Luffy's face was blank, betraying no emotions. Zoro seethed. "Do you honestly think that I would leave my captain – my _nakama_ – for a selfish reason like that?"

Silence stretched in the space between them as Zoro panted heavily from his outburst, his tense muscles shaking. He hadn't planned for it to go like this. He'd just wanted to apologize... but this had to be said.

Luffy looked at his nakama while several emotions played over his face. Understanding. Confusion. Sadness. Acceptance. Zoro didn't know what to make of it.

Then Luffy sighed.

"So I already broke our promise", he finally said quietly. "I'm sorry."

"Huh?" Of all things the swordsman hadn't expected that. "What are you talking about?"

Luffy looked into the distance. "You will become the greatest swordsman, Zoro. I know you will. You have to." His eyes fell on the white swords attached to Zoro's hip and the swordsman grabbed it reflexively. "And I might be the reason you won't be able to do it. My dream might kill you."

Zoro opened his mouth to protest, but Luffy beat him to it.

"But" And now the captain finally looked him straight in the eye with so much conviction that it stole Zoro's breath. "You belong here."

So simple. So true.

The swordsman was silent for a second before he nodded with the surety of the tides. "Yes. I belong here."

Luffy smiled. "Good."

**THE END**


End file.
